Projection
There comes a time in every persons life where they must succumb. Where they must admit defeat and realise what the voice in the back of their head has been telling them since they were thirteen years old and realised it isn't getting any bigger.
The well wishes and hope catchers would say it isn't the outcome that defines us it's what we did to get there.
I would like to disagree, irrespectively. It isn't the journey or the outcome that defines who we are are a person, It's how we suck it up, dust ourselves off and project our self loathing onto the ones we love.
I know what you're thinking. You're thinking that not only am I astute and handsome, but that I must be great in bed. You are right on all accounts.
What is it that drives us to do this?
What is it that makes us take what we don't like about ourselves seek it out in someone else and make them suffer like we should have?
The answer is simple.
Everyone is an asshole.
The brilliant thing about an opinion is that I can make a broad statement like that and not be wrong. Whilst the statement may not be true, the fact that it's my opinion means it can't be wrong.
I have lived 23 years and two months and I take great solace in the fact that whilst I'm not always right, I'm never wrong.
I thought it, I said it - it is a fact.
All people are assholes.
Every person has that little child inside of them, and I don't mean the child that likes to exit through your stomache and get some McDonalds, or the child that likes to go on the swing, I'm talkng about the child nobody will admit is in them. The child that's like the kid who lived down the street and had an affinity for firecrackers and small mammals. This is the child that when you witness a horrific car accident, not only makes you look, but also makes you chuckle a little on the inside.
It is this sadistic bastard of a child that makes us take our shortcomings, turn them into and insult and hurl them at those who are closest to us.
Unfourtunatly, being a child it also means that is is weak. That is why it's projected at those who we know deep down won't hate us for exhibiting our inner asshole. It is so typical of people to only complain when they feel like there are in a place where they won't be persecuted or harmed (physically, socially, mentally) for their asshole-ness.
Thats we you never see a lone vegetarian protest in a butchers shop, or a lone homosexual speak out against how they're being treated at a local football club pie night.
Now that's not fair. There is no such thing as a lone homosexual, they travel in packs so they always have someone to bitch about and to.
It isn't the journey or the outcome that defines who we are are a person, It's how we suck it up, dust ourselves off and project our self loathing onto the ones we love.
It is weak for a parent who could never play piano criticise their child for not mastering Bach upon first hearing it.
It is not weak however for a parent to place tiny bundles of self doubt in the child, so they grow up always feeling inadequate.
I'm am not saying that allowing our inner douchebag to flourish is a bad thing, I'm just suggesting that one can always see the results of their sadistic, torturous ways without getting the blame for it when your child is a 49 year old alcoholic that gives oral sex to anyone that offers them a cigarette.
Please take two things away from this post:
1. If you are projecting your failures onto your children, work smart - not hard.
and
2. If you are the parent of that girl asking for smokes at Flinders Street station thank you!.
- db
The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself
Believe it or not, but I am a very self conscious person. I feel that my fear sometimes gets the better of me and causes me to spiral into a self depression.
One of my fears is that when things are going good, they will never last. I know that is pessimistic, but I feel its more realism them pessimism.
And that brings me to Obama. It was brought to my attention that on the 20th January 2009 there were like a billigion Obama blogs posted. I didn't want to be a sheep. I also didn't want my post to be lost in the masses.
I have a crush on Obama. Not in a "I want his sexy body" way, but in a "has there ever been another person in history to do what he has" way.
I'm looking past the fact that he is the first black man to be president in America. I really don't care about that. Don't get me wrong, yay black power and all that crap, but we need to focus on the main point here.
This man has managed to inspire a generation. Not just a nation, but a GENERATION. The way he delivers his speeches is done with such conviction, his own belief in what he is saying is inspiring. How can you not trust the guy? This man came from obscurity, like Palin, but unlike Palin, he has managed to connect with people, understand the hardships America is going through and personalise it for everyone.
This man is inheriting the worst economic situation America has seen. Unfortunately there are several other countries experiencing a recession as well. Obama has not only inherited America's problems, but the worlds. Every nation will be watching Obama to see his plan to get America back in economic safety. If he carries this out successfully I believe other world leaders will adopt a similar strategy to get their own countries back on track.
Obama has also inherited two wars, with the possibility of a third. I praise the man for closing down Guantanamo bay. I never understood how a country will invade another to "free them of an evil dictator", but had no problem committing their own evil atrocities at Guantanamo.
I believe strongly in Obama's plan to leave Iraq and ship more troops to Afghanistan.
No one belongs in Iraq...except for the Iraqis. Afghanistan is where the American (and Australian) troops need to be. Specifically the Afghan/Pakistan border. That's where intelligence says Osama is...that's where the troops should be.
And not that I care much about how America, at the lower levels, works, but Obama has inherited a dredful education system.
The reforms that he has highlights give me hope that America will be lifted from it's rut (and unfortunatly put an end to my "stoopid Americans" jokes).
Obama, through his honesty (atleast he is warning people it's going to be a tough 4 years), foresight, dedication and conviction has raised the hopes of millions of people. While I can never forgive American for inflicting the world with 8 years of Bush, at least they have seen the errors of their ways and elected the best man for the job. America got into some (MAJOR) trouble now there is a man with a plan to fix it.
Watching the T.V coverage of Obama's inaugaration I was amazed at how many countries were celebrating the day. Here in Australia I wasn't too surprised that we got live coverage of the day. We've been so deep in America's back pocket for the last 8 years that I was starting to think Australia was gay for America. What I was surprised at, was the fact that Italy, German, Kenya, England etc, all had coverage, and were celebrating the event.
Obama's effects are global
This is where my fears come into play.
What happens if this man cannot deliver?
It all seems too good to be true.
Not since FDR has there been so much pressure on a president. In Obama's case there is more, he now has to worry about how the world responds to his decisions, not just his country.
There are billions of people expecting this man to perform miracles in the next four years. There is only so much knowledge and money at his disposal, how is he going to get the world out of the rut it is in?
And I think the most depressing part of this situation for me is....
If he cannot do it, then this is the best the world will ever be. We've peaked, that it, it's not going to get better.
Obama is our last hope and that scares me.
It scares me because there is no Obama V2 lurking in the wings, the Obama we have now is the only man who can rise to the challenge.
At the end of the day he's just a man.
-ms
Comprende?
The older I get, I find, the less I comprehend.
By this I mean I understand a lot of things, well at least have the ability to understand.
What I seem to lack is comprehension - more so - I just don't get it.
The difference is simple. I understand the need to "hang out" I just don't get it.
For Example if I want to watch a DVD, I much prefer to do that alone than with a group of people I work or study with. If I did it alone I could at least re adjust my balls every now and then, you know?
Another thing I just don't get is dating.
Two people that find each other sexually attractive or at the very least "good enough" decide to make plans to lie to each other for a set amount of time and when they decide they have stopped lying or at least has shown tolerable lies, one of the participants will make the relationship "official".
I just don't get why people go through this.
I have a girlfriend and I do love her, and if I have learned anything from our 5 year relationship, it's that I never want to do the "dating" thing again.
I would never cheat on her, but I am a male. So when an attractive woman shows the slightest bit of interest I try to skip the dishonest dating stage and jump straight to the honesty to see if there is still any interest.
For example, instead of woo-ing the female with feminist-like and fair views, I like to cut through the crap and open with:
"The music you listen to is shit, your hips are a little big and your laugh isn't as intoxicating as it is vomit worthy but you look like you could cook and possibly put up with my unrelenting desire to see you bend to my will - should I move in today?"
I haven't had any bites yet. Not that I'm really looking.
Another thing I just don't get is patriotism. Patriotism and Religion for me go hand in hand in the way that they appear to be selective ignorance. I understand that in their conception society wasn't as complex and knowledgeable as it is today - what I just don't get is why they still exist today. We know that every religion is just a tweak on a previous one and before that was a way to explain the natural world, yet churches are still packed on Sunday. We know that Governments use Patriotism to control the masses (see Nazi Germany and the Patriot Act) yet people still stand behind their government blindly and actually make excuses for them.
I also don't get the "typical Aussie male".
I have seen these beings and even mistakenly been placed in their inner circles at time and had the displeasure of hearing them speak.
The conversations go a little like this:
Random Guy: "So I took the four by four and gave it to Johnno had the bastard lost balance and pushed the farkin' thing through his rear window HAR HAR HAR HAR!"
Random Guy 2: "HAR HAR HAR, yeah, Johnno's car is a Ford Ute, SXVDHXZ model yer? - Dane you and your misses drive a Ford Ute - what type of engine is it a straight six or a V6?"
Dane: "My car is red."
Random Guy 1: "HAR! Funny bastard, is it shaped like a V or is it more retangular?"
Dane: "My old car was blue"
I don't why they talk about such boring shit - but they do. I don't like to think it is my ignorance but theirs. Our country is at war, we are about to see the inauguration of the last chance for the west and we appear to be in a "crisis" of the money type and the best they can talk about is FUCKING CARS? I know the world is depressing but god damn we can't ignore it.
If it isn't already obvious I don't get a lot of things and I guess it should have been some sort of resolution to learn to get them. I would, but I'm afraid that if I learn something I risk becoming it.
Here is a short list of other things I don't and don't want to get:
- Absitnence
- "Grounding" in the age of the Ipod
- Technophobia
- "Straight" Pornography featuring "monster cocks"
- The colon
- The appropriate use of "talky marks"
- Internet forum superiority
- Why you fuckers don't comment
- Why people don't think 2 Girls 1 Cup is the single greatest statement on Internet morality
- db
the rainbow way…
Huh-lowwwww,
First of all let me thank the super nice people at The Opinionation for allowing me to deliver this e-sermon helping me spread the news of the yummiest religion around - Christianity!
Did you know that there are about 2.1 billion Christian on earth today - and with it often reported that one in five are of "the Rainbow way" that means there are 420 million yummy bubbies out there.
If you are one of the god-fearing and anti-child rearing, this message is for you.
I am just tickled pink at the coming of Armageddon... when God, that strong and muscle laden supreme being comes down from Heaven we will all be transfered to a place where we await judgment! Woo! Can you imagine it - we will al be in the same room and Paris and Lindsay and of course that human yum magnet Freddie Prince Jr!
ARGHGHGH ( ! ) I could just die.
But seriously, we will be judged by a panel of the most powerful beings ever to have existed, God, JC, Mary, JT*
*OMFG TIMBERLAKE IS GAWD!
Those of us who are enlightened and prepared will be wearing super cute outfits that shine so bright the judges will just have to let you in, yes finally a judge with relevancy will except me - take that Tyra - pow!
Shazam! Now I know there are some mean beans that think you can't get to heaven when you follow "the rainbow way" - well to those close minded hetero-meanie-poos I say:
NAH NA NA-NA NAAAAAAAAAA
Jesus loved me. Um, loves me.
All jokes aside my flock of pretty-birds... this stereotype of good and decent hetero-deficient people being nothing but bad , sinning and sexually perverted must stop. We are not sluts.
Like our straight(er) counterparts we are looking for a deep connection.
As long as his front bit deeply connects to my back bit I am ooooooooo-kkkkkk right?
My mission form God is to preach tolerance and that is why I'm typing up this sermon for the sinners that frequent this site.
Prejudice and stereotypes ruin society. They are the cancer and tolance and peace are the cures.
And that is why it shouldn't matter which hole you stick it in -
Laughing at midgets is just wrong.
Be TOLERANT
Ahhhhh....men
Father Rainbow xxx ________________________________________________________Another Cartoon:
Top ten reasons why I am better then Dane
1. I'm better looking then Dane
2. I'm better in bed then Dane
3. I'm not a social 'tard like Dane and can talk to people without crying
4. I don't believe my 'tard ideas actually matter
5. I own a car that works and don't leech off my friends
6. I don't need to buy stain resistant pants, because I don't splooge on my pants
7. I don't live miles from the city, I live in a little place called civilisation....not the sticks
8. I don't have a man crush on Trent Reznor and touch myself at night
9. I have a life so I'm not in bed by 9pm every night
10. People like me
-ms
Budget 09 – Fix it
The 2003/04 budget the Victorian government allocated $305 millions dollars to the medical sector.
In the 2006 budget the victorian government allocation $215 million dollars to the medical sector. During this same time frame the Victorian governments allocation to the arts rose from $117 millions dollars to $130 million dollars. This people....is unacceptable. Why, when there a millions of people dying in this country every year, do we insist on providing money to the arts? And from what the figures show, we are pulling money from the medical sector and pumping it into the arts.
Last time I checked, a cow in a tree will not cure cancer. An over priced and over schedule big wheel will not fund diabetes research. So from what I can deduce the Victorian government wants our fat little kiddies (dying of diabetes and cancer) to spend their short precious time on this earth....looking at really shit art. Way back in the day, working in Melbourne in the medical research field was seen as a prestigious career. But with the lack of funding, all of our brilliant minds have moved overseas. Germany and America are now leading the way in research breakthroughs. AMERICA IS BEATING US.
We, the country who invented the cochlear ear plant, we the country who devised a cheap cure for preventative blindness, WE ARE GETTING BEATEN BY AMERICA. I guess the state and federal governments don't want to be seen as the leaders in medical research (or anything really). It appears they would rather divert the money and make it available for art students. Well you little hippy, tight ass, smells a little funky art students, I say "Get a real job and stop taking our money".
People of the world...unite and put an end to this travesty. Petition your government, harass your local council, and beg your mum.
On side note. When did generic medicines become such a hype? They play to the lowest common denominator of society and in the end do not benefit anyone. When you buy panadol (who is owned by glaxo smith and klein) that money goes back to GS&K. Now I'm not usually one for lining the coffers of the big companies, however when it comes to medicine, the companies aren't as evil as everyone makes out. So you buy your panadol and your $3.50 goes to GS&K, times that by a couple of millions people and the company now has about $5million laying around. They can now spend that $5 million on drug research to help improve the quality of life for all out there (including you).
Now if you buy the generic medication, which is $1 cheaper, that money is going to the pharmacy. Last time I checked, the pharmacy already makes money, and they do nothing for the community apart from provide a service (which is government subsidised). So now you're just helping your local pharmacist get richer.
I'll take my chances with the larger organisation, so that my expenditure has the ability to help others and not just one selfish twat. (this almost makes me sound nice??)
-ms
the slogan
If we could learn anything from the past four years, it would be that if one wants to inspire - from a political standpoint - one must have a great slogan.
In 2007 during his campaign Kevin Rudd had the popular and zingy "Kevin '07". Wow, it was marketing genius and one could say his only reason for winning. It was exactly the right thing to sucker in the first time voters - a slogan you can print on a beanie!
Although 2008 didn't reveal an actual slogan for the ALP, with KRudd's insistence on placing everything to a long term investigative comittee would suggest the unofficial slogan was - "Wait '08".
The last quarter of 2008, however, saw an emergence of the ultimate slogan, one that not only was marketable but also inspirational. Unsurprisingly it came from probably the most inspirational person of the decade, Barrack Obama.
NOTE: Regular readers will know of my total man crush on the 44th president - but I insist I'm not the only one.
As we are in the dawn of 2009, I got to thinking, what should Kevin Rudd and the Labor party have as their new slogan. It would have to be something that not only captures the achievements thus far but also the direction the party is heading.
If we look at current events, the answer is obvious. The lack of decision on infrastucture, the lowering of emission targets and the non-firing of Steven Conroy.
Ok, the real slogan has been submitted to a committee who will be researching it's viability in today's complex environment. They expect the final report to be completed in 12 - 18 months.
I suggest mine be used in the interim until a more suitable one be chosen. Who knows, maybe mine will stick...
- db
The Airforce will turn you into a slut
Alright, I know I'm due for a post, and this technically counts as one, however this will be brief.
Don't panic people, my random musings will return, but right now I really can't be f@cked writing anything.
What I will point out is this:
If you happen to be watching free to air T.V over the coming weeks. Look out for the new Australian AirForce commercial. Specifically the chick who is talking about "developing new technologies to manage goods dispatch" (or some crap like that). She's in the back of a cargo plane doing her bit for the Australian government (who has done nothing for her).
Note her job title.
That's right...she's a LOAD MASTER.
So...The airforce will pay you minimum wage...like a prostitute. The airforce will teach you how to "master your load"...like your fellow hookers would (I think they call it 'training'), and the airforce will reprimand you if you do not obey (like your pimp)
So people of Frankston...I offer you the greatest career choice there is to make.
JOIN THE AIRFORCE